


Consensual

by AmberBrown



Series: Earning Their Keep [2]
Category: The Musketeers (2014)
Genre: Dominant, F/M, Fuck Or Die, M/M, Submissive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-14
Updated: 2017-11-16
Packaged: 2019-02-02 12:32:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12726648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmberBrown/pseuds/AmberBrown
Summary: Aramis took a breath before he spoke, ‘we were attacked on the way back…we were overpowered by them. They said they were going to ransom us. They kept us in a cellar, we were…’ Aramis paused, he was staring at the floor, it was clear to everyone in the room he was struggling to speak.‘We were assaulted by the men,’ said d’Artagnan, ‘the leader took Aramis and I was…given…to the other men…’Treville cursed under his breath. Athos stepped forward and reached out his hand, squeezing each of their arms in turn. Porthos shifted uncomfortably, a look of anger on his face.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Several of you lovely reviewers asked for me to continue ‘Earning Their Keep’, you wanted to know what happened next, how Athos and Porthos reacted and how Aramis and d’Artagnan moved on after the attack.   
> Well, here it is. The first chapter is mainly awkward conversations between the boys and a couple of conversations involving Constance that are not so awkward. Because Constance has more balls than the boys sometimes.

Chapter One

It was not unusual for the men to return a couple of days later than expected when they were on lengthy missions. Athos was not concerned when Aramis and d’Artagnan had not returned when they were expected. But now, as the third day dawned he was becoming concerned. He had arrived at the garrison early, in the hopes that they had returned overnight. All he found was an equally concerned Porthos, sat at the table cleaning his gun. 

‘They’ll be back today,’ Porthos said as Athos poured himself a cup of water from the jug.

‘Of course, they will,’ replied Athos in a repeat of the greeting they had shared the previous day.

They both looked up at the sounds of the horses entering the yard. Their friends had returned, but there was no hearty hello from either of them. It did not take Athos long to realise something was wrong. They stopped, d’Artagnan dismounted first before turning to help Aramis down. The marksman had bruising on his face and was holding his arm protectively. The man had been injured.

‘What happened?’ asked Treville as he walked down the steps looking them both over with concern. 

When both men looked at each other, it became apparent that neither wanted to talk.

Porthos rose from the table and walked across, the concern etched on his face, Athos joined him.

‘My office,’ said Treville as he turned and retreated up the steps. 

D’Artagnan followed with Aramis a couple of steps behind, they both had the look of men walking to the gallows. Athos looked at Porthos who shrugged as he too followed their Captain.

MMMM

When the door had been closed behind them d’Artagnan looked at Aramis who was not making eye contact now. He had been quiet for much of the return journey. Although they had vowed not to bottle up the effect the assault was having on them each d’Artagnan was now convinced Aramis was going to.

‘Well?’ said Treville, it was obvious he was concerned, but he also did not wish to wait for them to talk.

Aramis took a breath before he spoke, ‘we were attacked on the way back…we were overpowered by them. They said they were going to ransom us. They kept us in a cellar, we were…’ Aramis paused, he was staring at the floor, it was clear to everyone in the room he was struggling to speak.

‘We were assaulted by the men,’ said d’Artagnan, ‘the leader took Aramis and I was…given…to the other men…’

Treville cursed under his breath. Athos stepped forward and reached out his hand, squeezing each of their arms in turn. Porthos shifted uncomfortably, a look of anger on his face.

‘Aramis managed to overpower the leader the second time he was taken, and we killed them all.’

‘Where was this? We need to alert the authorities,’ said Treville, trying to keep the emotion from his voice.

Aramis managed to stumble through an explanation of how they had already sent word to the local authorities, that there was nothing more that needed to be done. D’Artagnan watched as Aramis finished speaking, he still had not made eye contact with any of them.

‘What is your injury?’ asked Athos.

‘Knife wound to the arm, d’Artagnan stitched it up.’

‘It was the least I could do…after what you did for me,’ said d’Artagnan.

D’Artagnan regretted his words immediately, he knew Aramis had hated the way he had needed to help d’Artagnan to prevent him from being injured when the man had raped him. He did not want to explain in detail what Aramis had done.

Treville seemed to sense the tension from d’Artagnan and did not ask the obvious question. He did not need to know what Aramis had done to help the young musketeer.

‘Do either of you need any further…medical help?’ asked Treville a little awkwardly.

‘No,’ said both men at the same time.

Treville nodded. He thought for a moment before speaking again.

‘Take a few days leave, if you want to talk to me I’ll be here.’

‘As will we,’ said Athos stepping forward.

‘Thank you,’ said d’Artagnan. 

Aramis did not respond, d’Artagnan got the impression the marksman just wanted to leave, to be alone. 

Treville nodded, ‘OK, I’ll see you in a few days.’

MMMM

Dismissed from Treville’s office Aramis could barely control his need to leave the garrison and return to the safety of his own rooms. He had left the room first and was already halfway down the steps before Porthos stopped him.

‘Why are you rushing off, don’t you want to talk about it?’ asked Porthos as he caught up with the marksman.

Aramis turned to his friend and in as calm a voice as he could muster he replied, ‘sorry, I just want to get back to my rooms and change…and…’

Porthos seemed to sense that Aramis needed to be alone, but he was not ready to let his friend go so easily.

‘OK, but I’m gonna walk you there.’

Aramis sighed, ‘it’s really not necessary, I’m fine, I’m sorry,’ he paused realising he was beginning to ramble, ‘yes, please walk with me.’

Porthos smiled before glancing back at d’Artagnan and Athos who had moved across to the table and were talking quietly. Aramis was already moving again towards the gates, Porthos caught him up and walked with him.

‘Does the knife wound need redressing? I could do that for you.’

‘No d’Artagnan did it this morning before we broke camp…his stitching is very good, you won’t need to rely on me anymore for that.’

Porthos stopped him, his eyes wide, ‘what do you mean we won’t need to rely on you?’ 

Aramis realised what he had said and managed a smile, ‘Porthos, I’m not suicidal,’ he said with a laugh, ‘I’m just saying his stitching is good.’

They walked on for a few more minutes before Aramis spoke again.

‘I just want to be alone for a few hours, I’m really OK. I will talk to you, but just not yet…please don’t worry about me.’

Porthos nodded, Aramis was not sure his friend believed him. He was not sure he believed himself. The ride back had been difficult, Aramis thought d’Artagnan had wanted to talk but the young man could not bring himself to and he was in no mood to discuss what had happened. At least not yet. It was still too jumbled up in his mind. 

He had helped d’Artagnan in a very intimate way and then been assaulted violently. He wondered if their relationship could ever be the same. They had both been raped, forced into submission, which gave them an horrific thing to have in common, but it was also something so horrible that neither man wanted to remember it.

Aramis thanked Porthos for walking him home, but declined to let him in. Porthos did not press the issue, he seemed reassured that Aramis was not going to do anything rash and that he really did just want to be alone for a few hours. 

Finally, alone in his room he stripped off his clothes, he checked the bandage on his arm and the bruising on his body. He was already stiff from the journey back. He poured himself a generous glass of wine before stretching out on his bed. He closed his eyes.

He was back in the well-appointed room with Beaufort who was roughly preparing him for sex, thrusting his fingers into him with little care. Aramis wanted to squirm away, wanted to push the man off him, but knew he could not. He knew he had to endure the assault and the sex that was to follow. The man had threatened to have d’Artagnan gang raped, and Aramis could not allow that to happen. Beaufort repositioned himself, his cock pressed against him…

Aramis woke with a start, he was breathing hard and sweating. The shouting from the street, which must have woken him died down leaving him alone again. 

He felt so ashamed at what had happened. How could he have let that happen? What kind of a pathetic excuse for a Musketeer was he?

MMMM

Constance looked up from the chair to see a tired looking d’Artagnan in the doorway, he looked about the room.

‘He’s away, we have the house to ourselves for a couple of days, if you want to stay.’

D’Artagnan smiled, but Constance thought the smile was only for her benefit. She rose and crossed the room to him, he took her in his arms and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was good but lacked something, his usual passion and urgency was missing. Even with the knowledge that they would not be disturbed d’Artagnan did not usually hang around when they were together. She would have expected his nimble fingers to be pulling at her bodice by now, but his hands remained where they were. 

She reached up and pushed him away slightly, cupping his face with her hand, looking at him quizzically.

‘Sorry…I’m tired.’

‘I’m sure I can wake you up a bit,’ said Constance coquettishly as she trailed her hand down his chest and pulled lightly at his breeches, before sliding the hand around to the small of his back.

D’Artagnan flinched, his breathing hitched slightly. She looked back up at him, for a second his eyes had become unfocused as if he were seeing something that was not there, the sight unnerved her.

‘What’s wrong?’

‘Nothing…I…just…sorry,’ he stammered before gently pushing her away and retreating a few steps, ‘I shouldn’t have come…’

He paused a few more moments before turning and leaving. Constance watched him go open mouthed.

MMMM

Porthos was angry with himself. As he walked back from Aramis’ rooms his thoughts whirled. His two friends had been attacked and assaulted and he had not been there to prevent it. He was supposed to be with them. If he had not been in a stupid fight at the tavern the night before and been knocked out for his troubles he would have been with them. 

It was his fault.

The three of them could have seen off the attackers. The haunted look on Aramis’ face as he had recounted what had happened played across his mind. Aramis could not even finish talking about it, d’Artagnan had finished for him. 

For two bright energetic men to be reduced to mere shadows had been heart breaking to see. D’Artagnan was young and enthusiastic, Aramis was cocky and charming, neither of them deserved what had happened to them. 

And he should have been there. He could have protected them.

MMMM

Sitting in his rooms was not helping him. He needed to be outside, not shut away in a prison of his own creation. He dressed slowly, his arm and the bruising on his body causing him to wince in pain several times. 

After buckling his doublet and placing his hat on his head he descended the stairs and stepped out onto the street. It was noon, a busy time in the city. He walked slowly along the road but found himself feeling apprehensive. Everyone he passed seemed to be a threat, particularly the men. He stepped out of the way of anyone in his path. 

He was wearing his Musketeer pauldron and weapons, normally people made way for him. Today they did not seem to be moving. He found his breathing was speeding up, he was sweating again and actually felt a little faint. He had to get away from the crowds in the street. 

Aramis turned into a quieter side road, he paused and leaned against the wall of a tavern trying to control his breathing. A drunk stumbled out of the tavern and knocked into him. Aramis jumped away moving rapidly along the road away from the man who slurred an apology. 

This had been a mistake, perhaps the solitude of his rooms was a better, safer place for him. He knew the overwhelming feelings of confusion and, he had to admit, fear, would fade with time, but he did not want to try dealing with them now. 

He turned and started to retrace his steps. When his injured arm was grabbed from behind he could not help the yelp of pain as the stitches were pulled.

MMMM

Dumbfounded by d’Artagnan’s bizarre behaviour Constance decided she needed answers. Something had clearly been bothering her young lover. She was sure if was not something she had done, she wanted to know what had happened. 

She had seen him off on his most recent assignment with Aramis. She remembered Porthos sitting at the table in the garrison yard looking very contrite and sorry for himself as he recovered from a concussion, unable to join his friends on their mission. Had something happened to d’Artagnan?

Constance walked with purpose through the streets, she had decided that as d’Artagnan clearly did not wish to talk about it perhaps Aramis would. She walked in the direction of Aramis’ rooms, if he was not there she would try the garrison. As she turned a corner she saw Aramis a little way ahead, he had not seen her.

She noticed the Musketeer’s face was bruised as he turned and began to walk away from her. She called out his name, but he did not respond. He was walking back towards his rooms. Aramis usually walked with a confidence and purpose that had anyone in his way moving aside, much as his friends did, but today he seemed nervous of those around him. It reminded her of the way d’Artagnan had been when he had visited her. 

As Constance caught up with him she reached up and grasped his right arm to get his attention. When he yelped in pain and turned rapidly pulling away from her she was shocked. He had pulled his main gauche and was holding it out protectively in front of him pointing it at her. For a split second she wondered if he might lunge at her. 

The look of fear in his eyes was quickly replaced by embarrassment, Aramis lowered the weapon.

‘Constance…I…I’m sorry…you…er…’

‘Whatever is that matter with you?’

Aramis looked around, a couple of passers-by had paused looking at him. He quickly replaced the weapon in his belt. Constance noticed that his right arm was hanging loosely at his side.

‘Sorry I have to go.’

Aramis turned away from her and hurried along the road, as he went she saw that he was holding his right arm across his body protectively. His behaviour was at odds with his usual demeaner. 

Constance was now convinced something had happened to both men on their assignment. 

MMMM

Athos was sat in the corner of the tavern, the bottle of wine in front of him was untouched. His attention was wholly on the young man in front of him. D’Artagnan had walked in and sat down in front of him without a word. 

Athos was not used to being joined by his friends when he sat in the corner, they would usually take the table in the centre of the room and if he felt like joining them he would. He had not objected to d’Artagnan sitting with him. 

‘I just walked out on Constance.’

Athos did not think he was required to comment so remined silent. 

‘She didn’t do anything wrong, I love her, but I just couldn’t…’

He trailed off. Athos understood what the young man was trying to say. The whole situation was awkward. His two friends had been attacked and abused and were now left with very confused and conflicted feelings. As burly soldiers they rarely showed emotion, and what had happened to the pair of them was a very emotive issue. Athos could understand how they both must have been feeling but he found it difficult to empathise with them. All he could do was be there if either wanted to talk. Aramis had disappeared quickly, Porthos had gone with him but Athos got the impression Aramis just wanted to be alone. If that was how the marksman was going to deal with it, then he would not interfere. D’Artagnan on the other hand had sought him out, Athos was prepared to listen to him and be a shoulder to lean on if necessary. 

‘Give it time. You’ve had a traumatic experience. Perhaps you should talk to her, tell her what happened?’

D’Artagnan looked shocked at the prospect, ‘I don’t want to tell her…I don’t know how she would take it.’

‘She is a strong woman who clearly loves you. She will not judge you.’

D’Artagnan thought for a moment before speaking again, ‘I feel so pathetic, that I let…that…happen to me. I feel emasculated. How can I…with Constance…after that.’

Athos was not used to conversations like this, Aramis was usually quite happy to discuss his conquests and Porthos liked to regale them occasionally with tales of his own affairs. But to talk about an intimate relationship was not something they did. The talk would usually revolve around the pursuit of the desired lady, or occasional man, in Aramis’ case, not what happened afterwards.

D’Artagnan’s issue was not something that Athos could help with, all he could do was sit and listen as the young man talked. 

‘Every time I close my eyes I’m back there…I can’t sleep with Constance if that’s all I can see.’

‘Talk to her, she will wait until you are ready…if it had been her who was attacked, you would wait.’

Athos watched as d’Artagnan thought about what he had said. 

MMMM

‘Aramis.’

Constance gently rapped on the door again, she knew he was inside. She turned the handle and pushed the door open. Stepping in she quietly closed the door behind her and walked through to the bedroom.

Aramis was stood with his back to her, he had taken off his doublet and shirt. A floorboard creaked as Constance approached, the musketeer turned to look at her. Constance gasped when she saw the bruising across his chest and stomach. He stared at her.

‘Sorry…I was worried…what happened?’

Aramis sighed and sat in a chair resting his arm on the table. Constance took in the bloody cloth and medical kit. His right arm had a wound that had been stitched. Several of the stitches has been pulled, she guessed when she grabbed his arm earlier. The man had been about to stitch the wound on his own. 

‘Let me do that,’ she said not giving him a chance to protest. She picked up the cloth and cleaned the wound gently.

Aramis watched her work for a few minutes, he tensed up as she pushed the needle into his skin but did not resist her. 

‘You’ve done that before,’ he said. 

‘Yes,’ she replied, ‘are you going to tell me what happened?’

Aramis looked away, Constance continued with the stitches wondering what had happened to him and d’Artagnan. She had seen them all injured before, she had cleaned d’Artagnan up on more than one occasion. But the way Aramis was behaving, the way d’Artagnan had practically run away from her was different. She finished the last stitch and wrapped a fresh bandage around the marksman’s arm. 

‘Where do you keep your shirts?’

Aramis nodded towards a chest of drawers, she collected him a shirt and handed it to him. As he dressed she tidied away the bowl of now bloody water and carefully re-rolled his medical kit before pulling a chair out and sitting down. 

Aramis looked at her for a few moments before speaking.

‘It’s not really my place to say what happened,’ he began, ‘you should ask d’Artagnan.’

‘He ran away from me…whatever happened to you both…it’s more than just a fight, please tell me…I’ll tell him I forced you to tell me,’ she said with a smile.

Taking a slow breath Aramis replied, ‘we were captured by some men…they assaulted us…they…’

Constance did not need to hear the end of the sentence, she had worked it out. Emotions flooded through her, shock, anger, empathy and pity. Without thinking she leaned forward and hugged Aramis tightly, when she leaned back again he had tears in his eyes, she stroked his cheek.

‘I am so sorry you went through that. Why didn’t he say what had happened?’

‘He had a harder time than I…I’ve been with men before…I at least knew what to expect,’ Aramis paused, he seemed surprised that Constance did not react to the statement.

‘I’m not blind Aramis, I’ve seen the way you look at people,’ she said with a smile.

Aramis managed a slightly embarrassed smile before continuing, ‘d’Artagnan was nearly hurt by the man who was going to…’

‘The man who was going to rape him, yes,’ Constance decided that dancing around the subject was not getting them anywhere.

Aramis paused for a few moments before continuing, ‘they were going to…rape…him without…err…’ 

Constance sighed, ‘do you think that all women are completely naïve? I know what men do. Do you think I don’t worry that something like this is going to happen every time you boys go off?’

Aramis looked a little shocked at her candour, it took him a few moments to regain his composure. 

‘Sorry,’ said Aramis, ‘I helped him, before they took him…so that he wouldn’t be injured during the assault. Constance, he was terrified…I’ve never seen him look so scared.’

‘Of course, he was scared, he was raped, I would be scared. And you, are you telling me you weren’t?’

She watched him blink a few times, tears threatening to fall from his wet eyes again. She wanted to take the pain away from them both, but knew she could not. It broke her heart. Aramis was a much more open person than d’Artagnan and he was clearly struggling to deal with what had happened. She could at least now understand why d’Artagnan had behaved as he did.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, she wanted Aramis to tell him everything, but she knew she could not push him for the details. What had happened to him and d’Artagnan was not only horrific it was humiliating for them both, she could fully understand his reticence in speaking to her, a woman. 

When he did continue, he managed to relate the details to her, she did not interrupt him. 

‘Do you feel better now?’

‘Yes,’ he replied quietly, ‘I told him he shouldn’t bottle it up, that he should talk about it…he told me off on our journey back when he realised I probably wouldn’t talk to anyone. I really should listen to my own advice occasionally.’

Constance knew the marksman would continue to suffer, that merely talking through the experience was not going to be enough to help him recover. He had mentioned his fear of being with someone again, that he might not be able to differentiate between a consensual act and the horror he had felt when he was forced to submit. She realised that d’Artagnan was probably going through the same thing, which explained his reaction when she had tried to initiate sex with him earlier. 

She wondered what the answer was? How could she help her lover and one of his best friends to overcome the trauma of the attack?

MMMM

Treville watched as Porthos walked back into the garrison yard, a faraway look in his eyes. He had seen the big musketeer escort Aramis out of the yard when the marksman had clearly wanted to be alone earlier. Porthos was being oddly overprotective. He could understand the man was feeling guilty that he had not been with Aramis and d’Artagnan, but his reaction seemed to be about more than guilt.

He crossed the yard and stopped Porthos before he could enter the armoury. 

‘Are you OK?’

‘Sir?’

‘I know you feel guilty about what happened, but it is not your fault. Even if you had been there the attack would probably have still happened.’

‘But if I had been there, we would have beaten the attackers, and they would not have been taken and…hurt.’

Treville contemplated the man before him, Porthos was not telling him what the issue really was. When Aramis and d’Artagnan had related the incident Treville had watched as Athos became uncomfortable, probably feeling much as he did. But Porthos, had just looked angry and not just at himself for not being there for his brothers when they were attacked. 

‘Try not to dwell on what could have happened. They need you now, but don’t smother them, let them dictate what needs to be done. Be there for them, as and when they want you. And stop blaming yourself.’

Porthos nodded, ‘I will try.’

Treville let him go, wondering what it was the musketeer was not telling him.

MMMM

D’Artagnan felt guilty about walking out on Constance, but the conversation with Athos had helped. He knew he needed to talk to her. He should have shown more trust in her. As he approached her house he was determined to make up for walking out on her before. He pushed open the door and stepped into the kitchen. She was sat at the table preparing vegetables, she looked up at him, her expression difficult to read.

‘I spoke to Aramis.’

D’Artagnan found himself frozen to the spot, he did not know how to react. Why had she gone to Aramis? What did she know?

She stood up and walked around the table to him, pulling out another chair as she did so. With a gentleness that she might use on a child she guided him to sit in the chair, after leaning forward and giving him a chaste kiss on the cheek she returned to her seat.

‘If you don’t want to talk you don’t have to, but you might find you feel better for it. Aramis did. He’s suffering d’Artagnan and I can tell you are as well.’

‘I’m sorry I left you…I…I just couldn’t…’

Constance smiled, she leaned forward and took one of his hands in hers squeezing it. 

‘I can’t begin to imagine what you are going through, but I can be as patient as necessary…but can you tell me why you don’t want to sleep with me? Is it because you are hurt?’

D’Artagnan felt himself growing hot with embarrassment for a moment as he remembered what Aramis had done for him to prevent him getting injured.

‘I wasn’t badly hurt, Aramis helped me.’

Constance nodded as if she already understood, d’Artagnan wondered how much details Aramis had gone into when they had spoken. 

‘Every time I think about sex, about sleeping with you, all I can think about is what happened…but that was with a man…Constance I don’t understand why I can’t make it go away.’

Constance knelt in front of him and reached up to cup his face, she looked him in the eyes.

‘You were raped, you were forced, then you had to watch as Aramis was taken away to receive the same treatment, is it really any surprise that you feel the way you do? He feels the same…d’Artagnan, you and Aramis need to work through this, together. Go and talk to him.’

She stood up, leaned over and kissed him on the lips, running her fingers through his hair as she did so. He could not quite believe what she had said. Had she just suggested that he and Aramis seek solace with each other? Did she mean for them to do more than just talk to each other?

He stood up and looked at her again, she smiled at him. 

‘I love you,’ she said and reached up to embrace him, he reciprocated.

MMMM


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the reviews. I hope you enjoy the next chapter.

Chapter Two

Aramis stared at the ceiling, he had awoken with a start pulled from the nightmare by a sound from outside. He had not slept well for several days now. He supposed it was to be expected. He had suffered a traumatic experience. But he would like the images to disappear or fade away, he would like the memories to be replaced. All he saw when he shut his eyes was Beaufort leering at him as he stood, naked in front of him waiting submissively to do his bidding. His memory kept returning to d’Artagnan’s terrified expression when he was pushed over the table, the way the young man had squeezed his hand as he was treated with such violence. Aramis felt sick at the images and memories. He wished he could lock them away. 

He knew it would take time, but how much time? Would he ever be able to sleep with a woman again, let alone a man? He could just about imagine sex with a woman but to take a man into his bed as either the giver or receiver in the liaison was something that did not appeal anymore. He wanted to enjoy the act, but he knew all that would happen would be flashbacks to his captivity. Even the foreplay would be tainted after he had helped d’Artagnan. Poor d’Artagnan who had sobbed afterwards, the young man had been reduced to a child for those few hours after he had been forced into submission. Aramis wondered if his friend had managed to be with Constance since the attack. 

Would the relationship he had with d’Artagnan be the same now? Immediately afterwards they had been occupied, he had been injured, d’Artagnan had been busy cleaning up and helping him. He had not seen his friend since they had returned. Other than Porthos visiting him daily and the first day when Constance had seen him he had remained alone. Would he and d’Artagnan be able to carry on as they had before the attack? Would it always be a bit strange to be near each other knowing what had happened, after Aramis had helped d’Artagnan?

Porthos was still full of guilt for not being there, although Aramis did wonder if there was something else bothering the big man, something more than just the guilt. Athos, he suspected, did not really know how to deal with them but he would be there to listen if necessary.

It was time for him to stop wallowing in self-pity, he swung his legs off the bed and sat up. The wound on his arm was healing well, the bruising on his body was fading. If only the mental anguish would go the same way. Getting back to soldiering was what he was going to do. Back to the garrison, cleaning guns and shooting at targets would be his medicine.

MMMM

D’Artagnan could still not quite believe what Constance had said. Over the last few days he had shared a bed with her, but they had not engaged in anything more than embracing. She seemed content to just hold him and stroke his hair, he found the contact comforting, but he could not imagine going any further. 

She had said to him a couple of times that he should speak to Aramis, that he should visit him so that they could work through the issues they were both having. Porthos had told him that Aramis had shut himself away and was barely communicative when he had visited. The attack was clearly taking its toll on the marksman. Other than opening up to Constance, d’Artagnan did not think Aramis had really spoken to anyone. 

And now Constance had told him, to visit his friend and do what? She had intimated that in order for him to dispel the negative images he had of the attack he would have to replace them with positive ones. Initially he thought she meant by sleeping with her, but that would never work. He could not equate sleeping with her, with her gentleness and softness with the feeling of being held down on the table as the rapists cock was pushed roughly into him. He shivered at the thought.

Did Constance really think that he should sleep with a man, with Aramis, to change the negative experience to a positive one? To replace the memory. Would that even work? It was a ridiculous notion. But somehow, he kept returning to the thought that it might. And there was no one else he would trust more than Aramis. He knew their relationship was never going to be the same again, so this would not make that much difference. Would it? But would Aramis agree? 

Standing in front of the door to his friend’s rooms he wondered if this was terrible mistake. What if Aramis was disgusted by the idea? 

D’Artagnan decided he would test the waters, he would find out how Aramis was first. Ease up to his bizarre request. He raised his hand and knocked.

MMMM

The look of surprise on Aramis’ face worried d’Artagnan when the marksman opened the door. He knew he had arrived unannounced, but he had hoped that his friend would be happy to see him.

‘I’m sorry…I’ll go.’

‘No, you won’t,’ replied Aramis standing aside and ushering the young man in.

‘I’m guessing Constance sent you?’

Had Constance suggested the same thing to Aramis? Did his friend already know why he was here?

‘She told me you spoke. Porthos said you had shut yourself away…I was worried.’

‘Yes, I have been a bit of a recluse, but I was all set to return to the garrison this morning,’ Aramis said as he indicated a chair. D’Artagnan sat watching Aramis as he sat in a chair by the small hearth pulling his boots on.

‘Good…are you…well?’

‘As well as can be expected. The wound on my arm is healing well, you did a good job with the stitches…’

‘That’s not what I meant.’

Aramis leaned back in the chair and looked at d’Artagnan. The marksman looked tired and a little unfocused.

‘I’ve not slept well…since we got back…I…keep seeing it…I’ve had nightmares…It’s been the most unpleasant thing I’ve ever had to endure…I hate it…and wish it would go away…’

D’Artagnan could not help a smile as his friend finished speaking.

‘Me too.’

‘Aren’t we lucky,’ said Aramis returning the smile.

‘Do you know what the matter is with Porthos? He’s acting very strange, I know he feels guilty, but I’m sure there’s more to it.’

‘Perhaps we could put our energy into finding out what is affecting him and try to forget what is affecting us?’

D’Artagnan chuckled, ‘we could try ignoring it couldn’t we? But I don’t think that will really solve the issue,’ he paused for a moment watching Aramis who continued to look at him, ‘I’ve been feeling the same way as you, I want to sleep with Constance, but I keep thinking I’ll have flashbacks and I’ll either get aggressive or…won’t be able to…have sex with her.’

‘Why would you be aggressive?’

‘The only thing I can think about is the violence of it,’ d’Artagnan decided he would be blunt, ‘being fucked by a man was the most uncomfortable thing that has ever happened to me…and now I can only think of sex as being an abhorrent thing, I think I might physically push her away…and I don’t want to think like that…Aramis,’ he sighed then said what he had come to say, ‘will you fuck me?’

Aramis looked at d’Artagnan. The request had earned d’Artagnan the marksman’s full attention. 

‘I want to have an experience of sex with a man that is not negative…I want to have a good experience…with you.’

Aramis did not know where to look. He opened his mouth to respond but d’Artagnan could tell he was overwhelmed. 

‘I’m sorry, it’s a stupid idea. Maybe that’s not what Constance was thinking when she suggested we should work though our problems together.’

D’Artagnan stood, he wanted to run away again, he could not believe he had even suggested the idea. He was half way across the room to the door before Aramis managed to find his voice again.

‘Yes.’

D’Artagnan stopped and turned back to Aramis who was looking up at him.

‘I told Constance I could not imagine being with another man…that I thought I would never be able to have sex again…she is the most amazing woman. Did she really suggest we sleep together?’

‘I think she did. At least I think that’s what she meant…I’m not sure,’ said d’Artagnan feeling a little awkward.

‘I’d like to…have sex with you…but only if you really want to. I would never want you to think that you should just let me fuck you and that it would make…what happened to us…go away.’

Aramis looked a little embarrassed as he spoke. The whole conversation was very strange. D’Artagnan found he was laughing.

‘Is this the strangest way you’ve propositioned someone or been propositioned?’

‘Yes…’ replied Aramis with a smile, ‘I don’t even know if it will work…we were both assaulted…d’Artagnan, we were raped…would us sleeping together help us to recover from that?’

‘I don’t know. Do you remember what I said when we were on our way back?’ Aramis shook his head, d’Artagnan continued, ‘I said I would not let this beat me. So, I’m willing to try. But only if it would help you to.’

‘I believe it would. You said you wanted to replace the negative experience with a positive one, I feel the same. I’ve thought about the men that I know that I could sleep with and I cannot think of one that I would trust enough for the first time after…that happened.’

Aramis stood up and closed the gap between them, he put his hands on d’Artagnan’s shoulders and looked him in the eyes. D’Artagnan was pleased to see he was focused again, ‘are you totally sure you want to do this?’

‘Yes.’

‘OK,’ said Aramis, ‘although I’m afraid we will have to wait until my arm is fully healed, I’m not really up to anything too energetic yet.’

D’Artagnan thought that this was Aramis’ way of giving him a chance to back out if he wanted to, it gave them both some time to think the implications through fully. 

‘I understand.’

Aramis pulled him in for a hug, they held each other for a few seconds before pushing away. 

‘Now,’ said Aramis in a tone that indicated they were to move on from the subject, ‘let’s continue to ponder the Porthos mystery.’

MMMM

‘Porthos, if you do not leave them both alone I will ask Treville to have you assigned to completely different duties to the rest of us. They know you mean well but you cannot watch them both all the time.’

Porthos stopped walking across the garrison yard, he had been following d’Artagnan who was leaving with two cadets to patrol the market. He looked across at Athos who was rubbing down his horse.

‘I’m sorry…I just don’t like the idea of them not ‘aving someone with them.’

‘It’s been two weeks, they are both back. Aramis is still quiet, but he is not being as stand offish as he was, and d’Artagnan is almost back to his usual self. They are getting there. What happened was, horrible, for us as well as them. And we know you feel guilty, but you have to move on.’

Porthos’ shoulders slumped a little. He crossed to stand beside Athos allowing the horse to nuzzle his hands. 

‘I’m just worried about them.’

‘I know, but you need to give them some space,’ said Athos looking around the yard, he spotted a cadet who was not already gainfully employed. 

‘Jean,’ he called over to the lad, ‘come and practice your sparring with Porthos…’ he turned back to Porthos, ‘work off some of that anger on Jean…you will feel better…just do not break the lad in the process.’

Porthos smiled and drew his sword advancing on the apprehensive youth. As they sparred Athos wondered what it was that Porthos was not telling them. Aramis and d’Artagnan had both said that they believed there was more to Porthos’ overprotectiveness than he was letting on. 

MMMM

Aramis had told d’Artagnan that he was fully fit and would be ready to entertain him when he was ready. D’Artagnan had smirked at the formalness of the marksman’s invitation. Aramis had smiled and walked away. They had not mentioned their agreement since it had been made. But d’Artagnan had felt somehow relieved that the option was there for him. He knew Aramis would not think any less of him if he changed his mind, but he still wanted to go through with it. He was still suffering with recurring flashbacks of being forced down over the table and held there firmly as the man pushed into him. 

The images and feelings were something he needed to supersede. He hoped that by making newer, better memories of an experience with a man it would supplant the evilness he had endured. Although, d’Artagnan would be the first to admit he was nervous about the upcoming encounter.

He knocked on the door. 

As he opened the door Aramis smiled and ushered the young man in. Wearing only his shirt and breeches and holding out a glass of wine Aramis seemed quite relaxed.

‘I expect you’re nervous,’ he said as d’Artagnan took the glass, ‘I am as well…so don’t worry about it.’

D’Artagnan was guided to a chair by the lit fire. Aramis sat opposite him picking up his own glass and taking a swig before leaning back in his chair.

‘Now,’ he said making sure he had d’Artagnan’s full attention, ‘I want you to guide me. I need you tell me if you are uncomfortable, and definitely if you are in pain. What we are going to do should not hurt. It might be a little uncomfortable at times, but it should not hurt you.’

D’Artagnan nodded, noticing a slight shake in his hand as he took another sip of wine.

‘We can take our time…I want you to enjoy this…which is after all, the aim of tonight.’

D’Artagnan nodded. He put down his glass and leaned forward to pull off his boots. He stood up and reached for the buttons of his doublet but found Aramis’ hands on his.

‘Allow me…’

Aramis slowly undid the buttons, when he reached the young man’s weapon belt he unbuckled it and placed it gently down on the floor beside the chair. He continued to undo the buttons before helping d’Artagnan to shrug out of the jacket. 

He let out a shaky breath, Aramis looked him in the eyes and smiled, ‘OK?’

‘You’ve only taken my jacket off…’

They both smirked. D’Artagnan pulled in a quick breath as Aramis began popping the buttons on his breeches with one hand as he slipped the other around his head and pulled him in closer. One thing that had played on d’Artagnan’s mind in the days leading up to their liaison was if they were going to kiss. He had not been sure if he had wanted to, finding the idea odd. It had amused him during his contemplations that he was prepared to let Aramis fuck him and touch him intimately but was not sure about kissing him. 

When their lips met he changed his mind and allowed it to happen, Aramis pushed his tongue against his lips. D’Artagnan found himself opening his mouth slightly and pushing back into the kiss. It occurred to him, quite incongruously, that Aramis was very good at kissing. D’Artagnan found he was enjoying it. Then he felt Aramis’ hand brush against his groin and flinched away, breaking off all contact. 

‘I’m sorry…are you OK,’ said Aramis, obvious concern on his face.

‘Yes…I was just a bit…not expecting you to touch me…there.’

‘I would like to be able to touch you everywhere. If you will allow me? I think you will enjoy it more if I can do that.’

D’Artagnan nodded and stepped back towards Aramis who started to pull at the young musketeer’s shirt, untucking it. D’Artagnan allowed Aramis to pull the garment over his head. Without warning Aramis hooked his fingers over d’Artagnan’s breeches and pushed them down to his ankles, pulling his stocking down at the same time. When he stood up he looked at d’Artagnan expectantly. D’Artagnan did not understand.

‘If I remain as I am I have more dominance over you and that is not what tonight is about.’

He spread his arms to the side indicating his still clothed body. D’Artagnan nodded, understanding, he stepped forward again, kicking his breeches and stockings aside. He began undoing Aramis breeches then pushed them down. Aramis stepped out of them, as d’Artagnan stood up again he grabbed the hem of the loose shirt and pulled it up over the marksman’s head. 

Aramis leaned in for another kiss, d’Artagnan did not resist but did find himself gasping a little as a wandering hand stroked across his chest and down to the front of his underclothes. He could sense Aramis smiling at the reaction he elicited by the action. Aramis started to gently manoeuvre him toward the bedroom.

D’Artagnan stopped him and pulled away from the kiss, ‘no,’ he said, ‘the table.’

Aramis looked quizzically at him.

‘I need it to be the same, I want to replace it…wipe it out…please.’

Aramis nodded slowly, ‘if that is what you want, but you would be much more comfortable on the bed.’

D’Artagnan shook his head, ‘please.’

‘OK.’

Aramis pushed him against the table, he reached down and undid the ties of his underclothes and pushed the fabric apart, the garment slipped to his ankles. D’Artagnan was panting as Aramis closed his hands around his cock. He swallowed as he felt it growing hard. 

The marksman kissed him again briefly before turning him around and allowing him to lean himself forward. D’Artagnan was breathing a little fast as the memories tried to push their way to the surface of the last time he had been in that position. 

‘Remember to tell me if you are uncomfortable.’

D’Artagnan nodded. He sensed Aramis moving away briefly when he returned he felt his hand on his buttocks, in a similar fashion to the horrible moment in the cell when Aramis had prepared him to be raped. 

‘I have time to do this properly…’

He was aware of Aramis pulling the stopper from a bottle, he heard it being placed on the floor under the table. He felt a finger slide between his buttocks and tease him, he tensed up.

‘Relax.’

The finger was very gently pushed into him, d’Artagnan gasped, tensing again. He took a deep breath and forced himself to relax.

‘Good,’ said Aramis.

The finger was pushed in slowly, then pulled back gently. Aramis continued to move the digit in and out for a few minutes then he hooked his finger slightly and d’Artagnan gasped as a wave of pleasure washed over him.

MMMM

Aramis had been a little worried when d’Artagnan had asked to be fucked over the table, but he did not want to go against the young man’s wishes. 

As he hooked his finger inside the young man and elicited a gasp he knew he had hit the spot. He smiled. The pleasure he was getting from giving d’Artagnan pleasure was the best thing he had felt since the attack. He felt his own cock twitch as he continued to prepare the young man. 

He slipped a second finger in causing d’Artagnan to gasp again, but not in pain. A moan of pleasure followed.

‘How are you making that feel so good?’ 

‘This is not my first time d’Artagnan,’ replied Aramis with a smile as he scissored his fingers slightly.

Another gasp from the young man as Aramis slipped a third finger in pushing in and out slowly. 

‘Are you still OK, not uncomfortable?’

‘No,’ said d’Artagnan, ‘feeling full though.’

‘That’s OK, you’re ready now…do you want me to carry on?’

‘Yes, please.’

Slowly Aramis pulled his fingers out of d’Artagnan causing the man to moan a little. He quickly undid his underclothes and pushed them down, stepping out of them. He lined himself up and as slowly and gently as he could, pushed his hard cock forward.

D’Artagnan gasped again his breathing hitching several times. Aramis noticed that d’Artagnan had moved his hands to clutch at the sides of the table, his knuckles white. Realising his friend might be panicking a little Aramis slipped his hand from its place on the young man’s hip to encircle his cock, which had softened since he had initially paid it attention.

D’Artagnan let out a positive sound, although words seemed to be beyond him at that moment. Aramis pushed himself in and slowly built up a rhythm with his thrusts, his hand working on d’Artagnan’s now hard cock, rubbing at the tip eliciting more moans of pleasure as he did.

Concentrating on d’Artagnan for a few minutes he could sense the man was close to his peak. He came with a satisfied sigh, his hands no longer clutching at the edges of the table for dear life. 

Aramis smiled as he returned to his own thrusts, more confident that the young man could take the action. He came quickly, panting as he did so. Aramis withdrew from the young man as gently as he could. D’Artagnan was still breathing quite quickly. 

‘Aramis?’

‘Yes.’

‘Thank you.’

‘Do you want to lie on the bed now?’

‘Please.’

Aramis leaned forward and gently pulled the slightly wobbly man up, walked him over to the bed, and helped him to lie down. D’Artagnan looked a little unfocused, but he did not look scared or anxious any longer. Aramis stood up and was about to step away when the young man grabbed his hand.

‘Don’t go away, stay with me…’

‘I’m not going anywhere, I’m just getting a cloth to clean us both up a bit.’

D’Artagnan nodded his accent and closed his eyes, his expression content. After Aramis had cleaned them both up he lay on the bed next to d’Artagnan pulling a sheet up over them both. D’Artagnan had turned on his side with his back toward Aramis who tucked himself around the relaxed young man. He rested his arm across d’Artagnan who clutched his own hand around the marksman’s fingers. 

As they drifted off to sleep Aramis wondered if what they had done would help the young man. If the horrific attack had somehow been beaten into submission by them. They had waged a war against their rapists by pushing them aside and asserting their own, consensual dominance. 

MMMM


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Aramis awoke up to find the space where d’Artagnan had been the night before was empty. He felt the mattress, it was still warm. He stretched and turned over.

‘Morning.’

D’Artagnan was sat in a chair pulling on his breeches, he stood up and buttoned them before crossing to sit on the edge of the bed.

‘How are you feeling this morning?’ asked Aramis as he sat up, running his hand through his hair.

‘I feel like I have slept. I have not slept that well since we were attacked. I didn’t have any nightmares. I feel so refreshed…I really can’t thank you enough,’ replied the young musketeer grinning widely.

‘Glad I could help.’

‘And you, do you feel better?’

Aramis thought for a moment, he had slept well and had not been bothered with any nightmares but there was still something not quite right. He did not feel he had vanquished the demons completely, but he could not work out what he would have to do to achieve that. But for now, with d’Artagnan so obviously happy he did not want to sour the mood.

‘Yes,’ he said, ‘now, you need to leave before my landlady finds out I’ve had a man in my bed all night. Last time she caught me, I was forced to sleep with her three times…and she is not the most…pleasant of ladies to sleep with.’

D’Artagnan chuckled and quite unexpectedly leaned forward and kissed Aramis firmly on the lips.

‘Thank you.’ 

Aramis could not respond, he was rather surprised by the kiss. D’Artagnan walked out of the room with an obvious spring in his, slightly awkward, step.

Left alone Aramis pondered what it was that was leaving him still feeling insecure. The sex with d’Artagnan had been good. It was probably one of the best experiences he had had with a first timer, even though technically it was not d’Artagnan first time. 

He thought about the reason why d’Artagnan had wanted to be fucked. He had wanted to replace the experience of the rape with a consensual and pleasurable act. Whilst helping d’Artagnan do so had helped him to some degree Aramis realised that he had still not overcome his fear of being the submissive partner. He had fucked but not been fucked. That was what his continuing issue was. He needed to be fucked by someone he trusted.

He could not think of any of his male lovers that he would trust enough to help him. The only man he could think of, that he would trust was d’Artagnan. They shared a bond now, but he could not ask d’Artagnan, the young man was not that way inclined. What they had done the night before was a one off for d’Artagnan’s sake. 

Aramis wondered how he was going to solve his problem.

MMMM

Athos considered his powers of observation to be good, but he did not need special powers to know that d’Artagnan was feeling a lot better than he had the previous day. He practically skipped into the garrison, he smiled and greeted the man on guard before walking over to join Athos to wait for their duties to be allocated.

When Aramis wandered in, he too looked somewhat better than the previous day. He was not quite as full of life as d’Artagnan, but he was not far off. Athos wondered what had happened to change both men’s demeaner so suddenly.

When d’Artagnan looked across at Aramis and they made eye contact for a few seconds longer than was necessary Athos knew what had happened. They had slept together. He had seen the same reaction from the woman and men that Aramis had bedded before. The marksman was clearly an attentive lover and left his partners filled with contentment.

Athos would not say anything, what the two men had done was their business. He realised what they had done was part of their own healing process after the attack on them both. If sleeping together helped them, then he approved. He would, however, keep an eye on them both to ensure it did not affect the dynamics of their little group.

MMMM

A simple patrol around the streets should not end with the four of them battling against a group of men angry at something. Whatever the men were annoyed about was inconsequential to Porthos, stopping them from hurting his friends was his only concern. 

They had rounded a corner into a quiet road and been set upon by a group of six men. He and Aramis were fighting a man each, Athos and d’Artagnan had found themselves with twice as much work to do. 

The men attacking d’Artagnan had managed to push him back a few paces towards a crate lying discarded outside the closest building. As Porthos parried another ineffectual thrust from the man fighting him he saw one of the two men surge forward towards the young musketeer who took a step backwards and lost his balance toppling backwards over the crate. 

Porthos swung at his attacker and pushed him back a few steps. He glanced back at d’Artagnan to see the two men had grabbed him and pushed him up against the wall. The young man was facing the wall and being pinned there by the pair who were both bigger than the slight musketeer. One of the man was pushing his leg between d’Artagnan’s, grinding into him, forcing himself on the man. D’Artagnan had frozen, panic evident in his face. The man was terrified. 

Porthos yelled as he drove his sword deeply into the man in front of him before hurling himself at the two men attacking d’Artagnan.

MMMM

Falling backwards over the crate had been unfortunate, it gave the two men the upper hand. Before he had been able to regain his footing one of them had pulled him up and turned him, pushing him into the wall firmly. The attacker was bigger than him, he knew he could not push the man off. He glanced around, Aramis had finished off his attacker and was helping Athos with his second man, the first lying on the ground gasping for air, Athos’ main gauche piercing his lung. Porthos appeared to be about to swing a killing stroke at his man. Help would arrive for d’Artagnan, he just had to hold the men off for a few more seconds. One of the men was trying to undo his weapon belt, whilst the other was trying to liberate him of his money bag.

With a howl Porthos was there. He ripped the first man away, drawing his arm back and punching the man hard. The man crumpled to the floor, his nose clearly broken, blood pouring down his face. The second man was then pulled away and thrown to the floor. D’Artagnan had never seen Porthos so enraged, he was stunned as the big musketeer first kicked the fallen man before going down on one knee and punching him repeatedly. 

Aramis grabbed Porthos from behind and tried to pull him away. D’Artagnan snapped out of his shock and rushed to help, pulling the angry musketeer up and back a few paces. 

‘Get him out of here,’ yelled Athos as he turned to placate the people who had stopped to watch the fight.

Aramis hauled Porthos around and began to march him away. D’Artagnan swept along with them. A few hundred yards away a tavern came into view. Aramis guided them towards it. He pushed Porthos down on a bench at a corner table before looking at d’Artagnan and indicating the bar. 

When the young musketeer had returned with a bottle and four cups he sat opposite Porthos who was breathing hard, his head in his hands. Aramis was sat beside him, an arm slung across his friend’s shoulders talking to him quietly. 

‘They will both live,’ said Athos as he sat down next to d’Artagnan. Killing men who had attacked them was not an issue, but Porthos’ fist fight could have been seen as going too far and may have led to repercussions had either man died. 

‘Porthos, I really think it is time for you to tell us what it is that is bothering you,’ said Aramis, when Porthos did not move he continued, ‘ever since d’Artagnan and I got back you’ve been acting strange. We know you felt guilty about not being there, but this is more than just guilt.’

Athos poured the wine as they waited for Porthos to calm his breathing and sit back. His expression was one of regret. 

‘I’m sorry…it just brought back memories.’

‘Of what?’ asked d’Artagnan leaning forward, they were all keen to know what had been bothering their friend.

Porthos took a couple of deep breaths before reaching out and taking his cup of wine, he took a couple of swigs and set the cup back down. He looked at them each before he spoke again.

‘When I was about twelve I was nearly raped.’

D’Artagnan glanced at Aramis who had looked up briefly a look of anger on his face. 

‘You’ve never said before.’

Porthos looked at Aramis, ‘why would I, it’s not somethin’ I want to remember. The man, he held me up against a wall. He was bigger than me. I was terrified.’

‘You thought you saw the same thing happening to me,’ said d’Artagnan as he realised how it could have looked from Porthos’ perspective. 

Porthos nodded, ‘this last few weeks, I’ve not been able to get it out of my mind. When you two came back I felt so bad that I ‘adn’t been there. It wouldn’t have happened if I’d been there.’

Aramis said quietly, ‘I don’t actually think you being there would have made a difference.’

Porthos looked up, a little annoyed, ‘yes it would, if I hadn’t been in that stupid fight, I could have stopped you being taken. Three of us could have easily taken out the men.’

‘No, Porthos, you don’t understand. Beaufort was determined that he was going to have us to…abuse…we were not the first men he had taken. When I was locking up the house before we left I found his diary.’

D’Artagnan looked over to Aramis, ‘you didn’t tell me that.’

‘I didn’t think it was relevant, until now. He always took two men at a time. One for him and one for…his men.’

Aramis glanced across at d’Artagnan, it was clear the marksman was struggling to relate what he had read, the memories it was bringing back were unpleasant. 

‘There was an entry for a few month ago where they attacked three men on the road, Porthos they killed the third man…if you had been with us, one of us would have been killed and the other two taken anyway.’

Porthos looked shocked, ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Why be sorry? I’ve found it quite touching that you care so much about us. And now we understand why. You should have said earlier.’

‘I didn’t want to burden you with it when your attack was so fresh.’

Athos leaned forward, ‘you said you were nearly raped, so it didn’t actually happen…how did you prevent it?’

Porthos managed a small chuckle, ‘at the time it was the most terrifying thing that had ever happened to me, but now it’s actually a bit funny…’e couldn’t get hard. He held me there for ages rubbing at his cock, but he couldn’t manage it. In the end he smacked me round the head and walked away.’ 

They all smirked. 

MMMM

Several days later d’Artagnan watched Aramis walk into the garrison yard, he greeted him and wandered off toward the armoury. D’Artagnan knew there was still something not quite right with the marksman. Since they had slept together Aramis had been almost his normal self but there were moments when he did not know he was being watched that Aramis would stare off into the distance, his expression sad. 

D’Artagnan wanted to know what the matter was, he did not like the thought of his friend still suffering after the attack when he was feeling almost normal. He followed Aramis into the armoury. The marksman had sat himself at the table and was systematically cleaning the guns.

Aramis looked up as d’Artagnan pulled out another chair and sat down across the table. 

‘How are you?’ asked d’Artagnan.

Aramis looked at him, putting down his cleaning cloth.

‘Fine…why do you ask?’

‘Because you’re not fine, are you,’ said d’Artagnan, continuing before Aramis could reply, ‘are you still having problems, after we were together you seemed OK, but lately you’ve changed, it’s almost like you’ve gone back a step in your recovery.’

Aramis sighed, ‘yes,’ he admitted.

D’Artagnan did not say anything, hoping Aramis would carry on. He watched as the marksman collected his thoughts.

‘I have the same issue that you did. I’m having trouble pushing the thoughts of the assault…the rape…away. When I think about sleeping with another man and being fucked by them all I can think about is him, his…preparations…were very rough and when he fucked me, it was painful…and then he beat me.’

Aramis looked away, d’Artagnan could tell he was struggling to hold back tears. He felt awful for not realising how bad Aramis still felt. 

‘When we were together, I thought that would help me, but it wasn’t enough. I was, effectively the dominant partner.’

D’Artagnan hated seeing his friend suffering further mental anguish. He wished he could take the pain away. 

‘What if we slept together again, and I took the dominant role?’

MMMM

When d’Artagnan had managed to get him to admit what was bothering him he had felt the familiar pathetic feeling wash over him. He felt so useless. For a while after they had slept together he had managed to push the issue away and return to almost normality. But the feeling of ineptitude had gradually crept back into him. 

Now d’Artagnan had said the thing Aramis had wanted him to say for some time. The idea had been tucked away at the back of his mind, d’Artagnan was the only man he would trust to fuck him. 

Aramis stared at the young musketeer.

‘Let me help you. I hate seeing you suffer. You helped me…you would have to tell me what to do. You know I’ve never…with a man. But I really want to help you. You would trust me. Wouldn’t you?’

Aramis tried to order his thoughts. The way d’Artagnan described it made sense. The young man was inexperienced, so even though he would be taking the dominant role he would need to be talked through what to do. Aramis would not be relinquishing all control.

‘Aramis?’

He realised he had not said anything for a few minutes.

‘Are you sure?’

‘Of course, I’m sure…I wouldn’t have suggested it otherwise. I want to help you…let me help you.’

Aramis thought for a few moments, he knew it was what he wanted, he was fairly sure it was what he needed. He looked up at d’Artagnan, who had moved to stand next to him, and nodded. 

MMMM

In a repeat of his previous visit d’Artagnan stood at Aramis’ door feeling a little nervous. He also felt a little under pressure. He wanted to help Aramis overcome his fear and give him pleasure at the same time. He was a worried he might not be able to perform as was needed to complete his part of the liaison. What he was about to do was not something he had ever contemplated doing before. He did not find men sexually attractive, Aramis was an attractive man, and he could see why people were drawn to him, but he did not feel the same way despite the way he had reacted on their previous meeting. He realised he had enjoyed the encounter and a small part of him was looking forward to being with Aramis again, but he was in love with Constance, she was the one he wanted to be with. But he was ready to make every effort for his friend, who had helped him, he was pleased to be able to repay the favour.

He knocked on the door. 

Aramis opened it and ushered him inside. As before the fire was lit and a bottle of wine was already open. D’Artagnan undid his weapon belt and took off his doublet. Aramis took them and hung them on the hooks behind the door next to his own. 

‘This, my friend, is a very good bottle of wine, that Athos bought for me a couple of years ago. I had forgotten about it…found it this morning.’

Aramis poured him a glass and nodded towards one of the chairs by the fire. They sat in silence for a few minutes drinking the wine. 

‘You are more nervous than last time, aren’t you?’ said Aramis looking at him keenly.

‘Yes…sorry. I’m just worried I won’t be able to…’

‘Even if we can’t manage it, I am still grateful that you have come…it means a lot to me.’

D’Artagnan smiled, he took another sip of the wine, ‘it is good,’ he said. 

After a few more minutes of slightly tense silence Aramis put his glass down and stood up, he crossed to d’Artagnan and knelt in front of him leaning forward. D’Artagnan did not try to stop the marksman from kissing him, one of the things he had very fond memories of from their previous encounter had been the kissing. Despite his initial reservations d’Artagnan had found the kisses to be amazing. He leaned in and kissed back, bringing his hand up to cup Aramis neck holding him there. 

One of Aramis’ hands slid up d’Artagnan’s thigh and gently moved over his groin, his dexterous fingers unhooking the buttons on his breeches. D’Artagnan did not try to stop him. Aramis’ hand pushed the leather aside and pulled at the ties on his breeches. D’Artagnan found himself slightly distracted from the kiss as Aramis slipped his hand inside d’Artagnan’s underclothes and began to run his hand along his cock, which started to harden almost immediately. 

Aramis broke off the kiss and sat back on his heels releasing d’Artagnan’s cock at the same time. 

‘I don’t think you will have a problem in that department,’ he said with a knowing smile. D’Artagnan could feel his face redden. 

Aramis stood up, pulling d’Artagnan up with him, ‘undress me.’

D’Artagnan found he wanted nothing more than to strip the marksman of his clothes. He reached forward and quickly undid the man’s breeches and underclothes. He pushed both down at the same time, revealing Aramis’ already half hard cock. Aramis stepped out of the clothes and pushed them aside as d’Artagnan pulled his shirt off. Aramis did not wait for permission before pulling at d’Artagnan’s shirt, as he dropped the garment to the floor he pulled the young musketeer towards him again and kissed him firmly, d’Artagnan wrapped his arms around Aramis and held him for a few seconds before Aramis broke away. He hooked his fingers into d’Artagnan breeches and pushed them down, pausing when he reached his boots.

‘Forgot them,’ he said looking up with a smile. 

D’Artagnan was about to shuffle over to the chair when Aramis grabbed him and pushed him over to the bedroom instead. He firmly pushed the young man backwards onto the bed before bending down to pull the boots and stockings off himself. D’Artagnan’s breeches quickly followed. D’Artagnan wriggled out of his underclothes as Aramis moved onto the bed with him, their now naked bodies pressed against each other. Aramis kissed him again, one hand lightly caressing his skin, moving down his chest and around his hard cock to rest on his hip.

‘OK,’ said Aramis, as he leaned back slightly, ‘if I talk you through it will you prepare me, like I prepared you?’

D’Artagnan nodded, this was another thing that had left him with a feeling of trepidation. When Aramis had used the oil on him the feelings were indescribable. He only hoped he could reproduce that for Aramis. 

‘What do you want me to do?’ asked d’Artagnan as he watched his friend reach under the bed and produce a bottle of oil. Aramis turned over and positioned himself on his knees. He pulled the stopper from the bottle and lifted d’Artagnan’s right hand, he poured the oil over his fingers before putting the stopper back on the bottle. He leaned forwards on his forearms in a position reminiscent to d’Artagnan of the first time, before the rape, when Aramis had performed this duty. 

‘Slowly push one finger in and move in and out a little, I’ll tell you when to add another…’ 

D’Artagnan detected a little anxiety creeping into Aramis’ voice. He was not surprised, he knew that Beaufort had been rough with Aramis when he had done this during their captivity. Placing his left hand on the small of Aramis’ back he slowly slipped his oiled finger into Aramis. Aramis had started to breathe a little quicker but d’Artagnan put it down to the anxiety they were both feeling. As he pushed the finger in a little further he could tell Aramis was tensing up. D’Artagnan moved his left hand to Aramis shoulder and gently squeezed. 

Aramis took a deep breath and managed to relax a little, d’Artagnan slowly pushed in and out of Aramis. He wondered if he could recreate the amazing feeling he had felt when Aramis had done this for him the previous time. 

He glanced forwards and realised the Aramis had buried his face in his hands and was shaking.

‘What’s wrong, am I hurting you…what should I do.’

Aramis sobbed. D’Artagnan eased his finger out and leaned forward, gently pushing Aramis onto his side. Tears were sliding down his face.

‘I’m sorry,’ said Aramis with a sniff, ‘it’s just…he was so rough…I can’t get the feelings out of my head…I feel too vulnerable like this.’

D’Artagnan did not understand, ‘what do you mean like this?’ D’Artagnan paused before he guessed what Aramis meant, ‘can this be done in other positions?’

Aramis nodded slightly.

‘Then why not do it in a different position?’

‘Because this is the easiest way for you,’ said Aramis as he gradually got his breathing under control.

‘But, Aramis, this isn’t about me, this is about you. You are the one who needs to be comfortable. If this is leaving you feeling too vulnerable, then let’s do it a different way. A way that you feel safe.’

Aramis smiled, ‘thank you. I’m sorry.’

‘Do you want to carry on, we could leave it if you want?’

‘No, I’m fine now.’

Aramis turned onto his back and bent his knees up he grabbed a pillow and shoved it under his back. D’Artagnan understood and reached under the bed for some more oil. Aramis nodded to him and after putting the bottle back down he gently pushed his finger back in turning it slightly as he did so. 

‘Another.’

D’Artagnan nodded and slid a second finger in. Aramis gasped slightly causing d’Artagnan to pause. Aramis smiled and nodded again. D’Artagnan began moving the two fingers back and forth. 

MMMM

Aramis had felt slightly embarrassed at his breakdown but was grateful that d’Artagnan had remained so calm. Now that he was lying on his back and could see the man who was touching him so intimately he was not having continuing flashbacks to the rough treatment that Beaufort had given him.

D'Artagnan was being gentle, but he had also managed to hit the spot that gave him the most pleasure. He was ready for a third finger, he waited until d’Artagnan was settled into his work before asking. 

The third finger made him feel full, he closed his eyes briefly and took a deep breath, d’Artagnan chose that moment to rub the spot again causing him to gasp audibly. D’Artagnan stopped moving.

‘No, don’t stop, that’s…that’s…’

D’Artagnan understood and moved his fingers again concentrating his actions on the same spot. Aramis was aware his cock was hard. For a first timer d’Artagnan was doing very well.

‘I’m ready now…are you sure you still want to? You can back out if you want…I won’t hold it against you.’

‘No, I said I would help you and I’m going to…but would you be able to help me a little first.’

Aramis looked down at d’Artagnan’s cock which had softened, a reaction to Aramis earlier issues no doubt. He reached down and circled the young man’s cock with his hand, he moved his hand along its length, rubbing his thumb across the tip. D’Artagnan gasped and shut his eyes as Aramis continued to work him. After a minute d’Artagnan nodded, Aramis released him. 

‘How do I…’

‘Lean forward and guide yourself into me, you can keep moving, I can take it.’

D’Artagnan nodded and did as he had been told, Aramis felt the hard cock press at him then push into him, he took a breath and concentrated on keeping himself relaxed. One d’Artagnan had pushed himself in, he instinctively pulled almost out and then gently pushed back in again. Aramis nodded for him to continue.

As d’Artagnan got into a rhythm Aramis closed his eyes again, enjoying the sensation, knowing that this was what he needed. It felt so good. D’Artagnan had taken control of the sex and Aramis did not mind, he allowed his young friend to fuck him. He gasped again when he felt d’Artagnan’s hand around his own cock which was still hard. 

D’Artagnan moved his hand in time to his thrusts. Aramis arched his back as he came. D’Artagnan kept up his own thrusts for a few more seconds before Aramis felt him come as well. His energy spent d’Artagnan sank forwards, Aramis held him up slightly. 

‘You need to pull out of me first, then you can collapse,’ he said with a chuckle. 

D’Artagnan nodded and withdrew from Aramis before moving to lie by his side, panting slightly. Aramis reached down and grabbed the dampened cloth he had ready, he took d’Artagnan’s oiled hand and wiped it clean before gently rubbing the cloth over d’Artagnan’s cock. After cleaning himself up he dropped the cloth on the floor, and pulled d’Artagnan into an embrace, the young man did not protest. 

‘Thank you,’ he said quietly into d’Artagnan’s ear, as he kissed the man’s temple. 

‘You’re welcome,’ came the sleepy reply.

MMMM

D’Artagnan awoke to find the room lit by a few candles, Aramis was lying beside him, awake, looking at him, he looked a little concerned. 

‘What’s the matter?’ he asked. 

Aramis looked away for a moment before replying, ‘I’m worried this will change our relationship.’

‘It won’t,’ replied d’Artagnan. 

‘How can you know that, what we did, was very personal and intimate. I don’t want it to be something that now comes between us.’

D’Artagnan propped himself up on one elbow and reached out a hand to brush a few hairs away from Aramis’ eyes.

‘Our relationship changed the minute you asked those thugs if you could prepare me. When you did that I didn’t really understand what you were doing or why you were doing it. But I do now. And you cannot begin to understand what that means to me. They would have hurt me if you had not offered to do that for me. You didn’t have to help me, but you did. So yes, our relationship is already different…but I think it has changed for the better.’

Aramis smiled, his fear allayed. 

‘Do you think you can enjoy sex again now?’ asked d’Artagnan.

‘Oh yes, I think I have put that demon to bed now, thanks to you.’

‘Good, now sleep, without nightmares, I’m not going anywhere until you kick me out before your landlady finds us.’

D’Artagnan lay back down pulling Aramis down with him.

They both slept soundly.

The End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for all the reviews.


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